


one step closer

by icemachine



Series: doom patrol daily drabbles [3]
Category: Doom Patrol (TV)
Genre: Gen, Missing Scene, Post-Episode: s01e13 Flex Patrol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-08-14
Packaged: 2020-08-23 13:44:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20243812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icemachine/pseuds/icemachine
Summary: “Why did you come back for me?”There is, of course, no response.(Larry, while he changes his bloody bandages after he almost dies in Flex Patrol.)





	one step closer

**Author's Note:**

> prompt: one step closer

"Why did you come back for me?"

There is, of course, no response. There is never a response. Larry watches himself in the mirror; the blood had pooled in his mouth, the only path being either down his throat again or to let the blood trickle down his mouth, soak his bandages, soak him up to nothingness. He tried to swallow as much of it as possible, but blood, as always, has a mind of its own. Blood has its own desires and Larry's body has its own desires and radiation has its own desires and then there's Larry's mind: hands bound in the middle, crucified. 

He imagines that the Negative Spirit has its own desires, too. It left. It left him, and it came back. Why? Why would it come back? Why would it come back for Larry, who let it get tortured for years out of his own cowardice? Why wouldn't it jump for freedom instantly?

Why is Larry special?

Larry looks away instantly. He can't - he cannot see himself, cannot watch the blood continue to dry. He needs to replace his bandages. He can't go looking for the Chief in blood-stained bandages. He needs - he needs - normalcy. Oh. The word burns, but he needs normalcy. He is not special. The spirit certainly does not regard him as such. 

But. It came back for him.

It had a chance at freedom, and it chose Larry. He can't comprehend it. He can't comprehend it, so he takes his goggles off, tugs at the back of his head, unravels himself slowly, still eyes closed, still too afraid of his own reflection. 

"You know," Larry says, words slipping out like blood unwilling, "I don't... I'm not so mad at you anymore. Not like I used to be, at... at least."

He continues to remove his bandages. Something, some foolish part of Larry expects a chest-glow, a shimmer, something  _ real _ . The logical part: it won't happen. There is no sentimentality. It has to care about Larry at least slightly, because it came back for him.

He repeats it in his mind. The Negative Spirit came back for him. The Negative Spirit came back for him. The Negative Spirit came back for him. It came back, to save Larry. "We'll see" had been a lie to spill some kind of uncertainty into the situation for the others - he knew that he was going to die. The spirit knew that he was going to die, and it came back for him. It didn’t want him to die. It was willing to leave him behind, long ago, but things have changed. How have things changed? Why is Larry now worth saving?

When all of the bandages have been discarded to the floor, he looks back into the mirror. His mouth is entirely red. His teeth are red. Everything about Larry Trainor - sad and red.

He has some work to do.

“It doesn’t matter, I guess,” he says finally. “But thank you. For coming back, I mean. I don’t feel like dying anymore.”

His chest lights up, rises with a breath, and then it fades away with a flicker. They can do this, they can do this, they can do this. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading and as always feedback is appreciated♥


End file.
